Thankfulness

A young man named John received a parrot as an early Christmas gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary. Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and shoved him in the freezer.

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued............”May I enquire as to what the turkey did?”

Before any of you start wondering if a similar tactic will work on your children, I want to remind you that we all have so much to be thankful for. I hope you have a blessed Thanksgiving!

Unselfishness

One thing that seems non-existent in big-time sports anymore is taking one for the team. What I mean is, it is rare to see someone who is not only about themselves. Most players on TV are doing some sort of celebratory dance to draw attention to themselves.

That’s one of the reasons I am a huge fan of Todd Boeckman.

Boeckman, Ohio State’s senior quarterback was first team All Big Ten last year (his first as a starter). He led the Buckeyes to a birth in the BCS national championship game against LSU. He played very well most of last season but his performance slipped a little in the last couple of games.

Much was expected of him this season. He was supposed to lead the Buckeyes to their third straight national championship game. However, that was not to be.

An early season drubbing at the hands of USC changed all that. Boeckman did not have a stellar performance and the following week was replaced by Freshman Terelle Pryor.

Expectations would be that Boeckman would complain and throw a fit because he was being benched. Boeckman, one of the team’s captains didn’t do that however. He supported Pryor and said that he understood why Coach Tressel made such a move.

Was he upset on the inside? I’m sure he was. Did he want to be playing? You bet.

But, he put the well being of the team ahead of his own. Very classy.

And, he comes in at the end of Ohio State’s victory over Michigan to throw a picture-perfect touchdown pass. Great stuff! What a great way to end your career!

In my book, Todd Boeckman is MVT – Most Valuable Teammate.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

Philippians 2:3

Working to Glorify Him

Reggie Bush, the star running back for the USC Trojans and now the New Orleans Saints made it fashionable to write something on your "eye black" stickers. Many players wear these to cut down on glare from the sun and I believe many wear them simply to be cool. Bush used to write his area code of his home town on his and many players have begun to do the same thing.

On Saturday in Ohio State's lopsided win over arch-rival Michigan, James Laurinaitis, the Buckeye's star linebacker also had something written on his eye black stickers. He had "John" on one and "17:1" on the other.

John 17:1 says, After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed: "Father, the time has come. Glorify your Son, that Your Son may glorify You."

Two months ago I was asked to speak to a leadership bible study group in Toledo. While there I met a young man who is involved with Fellowship of Christian Athletes at Ohio State. He shared with me that James Laurinaitis is one of a handful of players who rarely miss a meeting and he said he is on fire for Christ. He said he is the real deal.

This is so refreshing. So, to me, Laurinaitis was saying that he wanted his play to glorify Christ on Saturday. How cool is that? Let's let what we do glorify Him today!

Pride Before The Fall

Many of you know that I am a huge Ohio State football fan. I was born in Columbus while my Dad was in dental school there and I think I was dropped on my head, so I'm a little brain damaged about the Buckeyes.

Tomorrow they will play Michigan for the 105th time. It is the greatest rivalry in sports. This year is a little strange because Michigan is struggling and has the most losses (8) they have ever had in program history. The Buckeyes have also under-achieved this year but at nine wins and two losses, they are heavy favorites (20 1/2 points).

I have talked to many Michigan fans and a few Ohio State fans who think this is going to be a blowout and that Ohio State is going to win big. I don't feel this way. I hope they are right, but I believe it is going to be much closer than everyone says. In this rivalry game, anything can happen.

I remember in 1996, Ohio State was beating everyone by an average of something like 30 points a game. They appeared unstoppable. That year they were an 18 point favorite over Michigan. Michigan won.

In the mid to late 80s, Earle Bruce was coaching his last game for the Buckeyes and they were heavy underdogs playing in Ann Arbor. Ohio State won.

In 1969, Bo Schembechler was coaching the Wolverines in his first Ohio State, Michigan game and his team was a huge underdog. This was perhaps Woody Hayes' best Buckeye team he had ever coached. Michigan won.

In this game, the record books can be thrown out. Anyone can win. That's one of the reasons this is such a great rivalry. I hope the Buckeyes aren't too sure of themselves!

The Bible even weighs in on this topic in Proverbs 16:18:

Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.

Go Bucks!

Patience

A good friend of mine, Rich called me on his way home from work the other day. He was as excited as I have ever heard him. His boss had just resigned.

This may seem like it's not a big deal...but in this case, it is a huge deal.

Several months ago Rich was sharing how awful it was to be working for this particular person. He mentioned that his situation was very similar to what I went through that led me to write Bleedership, Biblical First-Aid for Leaders. The fact he needed to deal with a boss like this was awful and I could definitely relate.

I suggested he go to the board of directors to see about having him removed. He said others had suggested that as well but that didn't feel right to him. He said he was just going to bide his time and possibly look for other employment. He said this was really tough, though because he loves where he works.

Well, his patience obviously paid off. Rich followed his convictions and didn't try to take things into his own hands. He let God deal with it and he has now been blessed for it. Thanks for the great example Rich!

Getting the Best From Others

Yesterday I shared with you some insights from John Maxwell on why the great leaders are great leaders. In a nutshell, John said the best leaders give their best to their people and they get the best from their people. Today John shares how the best leaders get the best from those on their team:

The Best Leaders Get the Best from Their People By...

1) LISTENING
The smartest leaders realize the limitations of their wisdom, and they listen to their people in order to capture invaluable insights. However, leaders don't just listen to gain knowledge, they also listen to give their people permission: permission to challenge the process, permission to test assumptions; and permission to take risks. Nothing turns off an up-and-coming leader like the deaf ear of a superior. The best leaders don't simply listen to incoming ideas; they proactively draw them out of their people. They listen actively, not passively.

2) RELATING
Leaders touch a heart before they ask for a hand. To touch a heart, a leader has to be open to disclosing his or her identity by sharing personal stories and owning up to professional weaknesses. Mysterious or aloof leaders may be successful decision-makers, but they won't get the heartfelt loyalty that comes from authentic relationships.

As simple as it sounds, making a person feel known correlates powerfully to their job satisfaction. In fact, Patrick Lencioni lists anonymity as one of the top indicators of a miserable job. Leaders dignify their people by studying their interests, learning about their families, and finding out their hobbies. Conscious of the power of connection, the best leaders refuse to be barricaded inside of an office, and they take responsibility for relating with others on a regular basis.

3) TEACHING
Gifted teachers have a way of making students out of disinterested bystanders. The best leaders have an infectious thirst for knowledge, and they take pride in cultivating knowledge of their craft and awareness of their industry. A leader's teaching ability depends upon ongoing personal growth. As Howard Hendricks said, "If you stop growing today, you stop teaching tomorrow."

4) DEVELOPING
The best leaders understand the differences between training people for tasks and developing people to be better leaders.

Training
Focus is on the job
Adds value to specific things
Helpful for a short time
Changes a performance

Developing
Focus is on the person
Adds value to everything
Helpful for a lifetime
Change the performer

The best leaders view their people as appreciable assets and prioritize investing in the talent on their teams.

5) MOTIVATING
After one of my presentations, an audience member approached me who was visibly indignant about my speech. "Why is motivation last on the list?" he demanded. "Well," I replied, "because if you listen, relate, teach, and develop your people, then they will be motivated!"

Sustained motivation comes by creating the right environment for your people and by doing the right things consistently to nurture them. Consider a flower. It cannot grow in the Arctic; it requires a climate conducive to growth. Yet, even in the right environment, the flower must be planted in hospitable soil, exposed to sunlight, watered, and freed of weeds.

REVIEW
The Best Leaders Give Their Best to Their People by...1. Growing 2. Serving 3. Modeling
The Best Leaders Get the Best From Their People by...1. Listening 2. Relating 3. Teaching 4. Developing 5. Motivating

Why The Best Leaders Are The Best Leaders

One of my favorite authors on leadership is John Maxwell. I recently received something from him that was very good so I thought I’d share it with you:

From 1996 to 2007, manager Joe Torre led the New York Yankees to the playoffs every year - winning an astounding 17 series in the post-season. Over those same 12 years, the Los Angeles Dodgers did not win a single playoff series. This past season, Torre departed New York to coach the Dodgers. The result? The Dodgers won their first post-season series in 20 years, while the Yankees missed the playoffs altogether. Ask Yankees and Dodgers fans, and they will tell you that Joe Torre's leadership matters. However, they may not be able to tell you exactly why Joe Torre is an excellent leader.

What's true of the fans in New York and Los Angeles is true for many of us. We experience the effects of leadership without understanding the cause. In this article, I hope to make plain why the best leaders are the best leaders. In a nutshell, remarkable leaders give their best to their people, and get the best from their people. Let's look at how this happens.

The Best Leaders Give Their Best to Their People By...

1) GROWING
People naturally follow leaders they respect as being more advanced than they are. For this reason, personal growth is directly proportional to influence. If you desire to gain followers, then pay the price of getting better.

To give people your best, you have to elevate your leadership capacity. Consider the metaphor of walking up a narrow staircase - you can only go as fast as the person in front of you. When leaders stop growing, they quit climbing and impede the progress of everyone following them. However, when leaders grow, they ascend the stairs and create space for those behind them to climb higher. Personal growth involves challenging yourself, and pushing beyond the realm of comfort. When is the last time you did something for the first time? How long has it been since you felt in over your head?

2) SERVING
"Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile."~ Albert Einstein

Serving others is an attitude issue. Unfortunately, many leaders operate under a king-of-the-hill mentality. They attempt to pull down anyone above them in order to secure the top spot for themselves. In doing so, they clutch at power, grapple for control of company resources, and strive to dominate others. Seeing relationships as win-lose propositions, they ultimately burn bridges and isolate themselves.

The best leaders take an entirely different approach. Rather than dragging down anyone who threatens their position, they extend a hand to lift the performance of teammates and coworkers. They function with a mindset of abundance as opposed to an attitude of scarcity, and they wield their influence to prop others up rather than to elevate themselves. Over time, they are honored for the contributions they have made to the lives around them.

All leaders serve. Sadly, some serve only themselves. Serving is a motives issue, and the crux of the matter boils down to a simple question: "Who?" Does a politician serve the public or his pocketbook? Does a CEO serve to benefit her shareholders or to support her lifestyle? The best leaders set a tone by serving and prove they are deserving of being out in front.

3) MODELING
Growing leaders have something to share; serving leaders have something to give; modeling leaders have something to show. As V.J. Featherstone said, "Leaders tell, but never teach, until they practice what they preach." The best leaders embody their values. Their passion exudes from every pore and demands respect.

Good stuff huh? Wednesday I will share with you the second half of this article which shows how the best leaders get the best from their people.

Extreme Comfort Zones

Jackie, center, and Aaron Frisch, and family and friends watch

the building of their home on TV at Whitmer High School.

I am so proud of two people this morning.

First, my daughter Molly. For whatever reason, she has been apprehensive about getting a job. Yesterday, she had an interview which apparently went well. As she was walking to her car in the parking lot afterwards, she received a call saying that she was hired. Way to go Mol!

Also yesterday, my wife, Connie and I attended a party for the Extreme Home Makeover project which was done in Toledo in September and aired nationally on ABC last night. It was a very cool night.

As I sat there watching it, I reflected back to a lunch I had with Tim Schlachter, a good friend of mine and Truth At Work member. Tim is co-owner of Buckeye Real Estate Group. He was telling me about a phone call he received from ABC, I believe the day before our lunch, asking him if he would consider heading up the project. Without hesitating, Tim said yes which surprised ABC.

This wasn’t just some token position which would allow Tim to be on national TV, this required a monumental effort to pull this off. He had to raise all the funds for the building of this 5,000 square feet house, put a volunteer crew of 4,000 people in place, schedule that crew, level an old house and build a new one in less than seven days. I am sure this made Tim a little uncomfortable. But, they pulled it off…and they did it very well!

Because Molly broke through her comfort zone, she can now be used by God in her new workplace and I am convinced she will be blessed.

Because Tim chose to do the uncomfortable and risky thing, he was used by God in an amazing way and his leadership has helped to change our city.

That is why I am so proud of Molly and Tim. It takes courage to break out of your comfort zone, but they both chose to do that and that is when growth happens.

So the question is…what are you going to do this week to break out of your comfort zone?

Ownership

Last night, Connie and I attended a meeting at CrossRoads, our church. This meeting was one of three we could attend and it was called by our new lead pastor, Dean Angell.

The purpose of the meeting was to discuss where we are going as a church. Dean began by sharing some of what God has been speaking to him over the past six months and then he asked us to write down and share some of what we envisioned. We had over 150 people in attendance and at first I thought it would be tough for Dean to keep everyone on task, but he did a great job.

I wanted to share this today because I believe Dean presented a tremendous model for any leader to follow when casting a vision.

I used to think that as a leader, you were supposed to come down off the mountain like Moses and announce to the people that we are going in this direction. What I have found is that type of leadership doesn't work anymore. You must get ownership...and that is what Dean did last night.

I believe last night's meeting (and the other two upcoming meetings) was a defining moment in our church's history. I believe everyone in attendance last night felt heard, felt that they matter and they felt as if they are a part of what God is doing in our body of believers.

What a great model to follow!

1. Wait on God (and purposely listen for Him)
2. Present your vision
3. Ask for feedback and listen to others (transfer ownership)
4. Adjust where necessary
5. Go forward
6. Repeat

The Power of Accountability

Yesterday, we had our first Truth At Work roundtable meeting in Toledo. It was incredible! In this group we have 10 executives who want to grow their businesses and grow in their walk with Christ.

We meet for four hours once per month and each member pays a fee to be a part of this group so this is a major commitment. Part of our time together was spent in telling everyone what our one personal and business goal was for the month...that one thing we absolutely want to get done this month at home and at work.

As we went around the room, it was cool to see what each person was saying. Some said they wanted to go on a date or two with their spouse. Others wanted to exercise 6 times per week for 30 minutes. Some wanted to have some tough conversations with an employee that they had been putting off. All lofty goals.

Here is where this is a little different. At the end of that time, we told each of them that if they don't accomplish their goal before our next meeting, they will need to pay $100 into our "giving fund" (will be given away to worthy causes periodically). Let me ask you this. Do you think each of their goals are more likely to be done knowing they are truly being held accountable? Of course they will!

So why is this important? Because most of us need accountability to change.

I recently read in Fast Company Magazine titled Change or Die. In the article they cited a study in which patients with severely clogged arteries were told they needed to change their diet and begin exercising or they would die soon. Seems like pretty good motivation right? Not so.

According to studies, only 1 in 10 (10%) of those told this news did anything about it. Can you imagine that? Being told you are going to die unless you change and yet still not changing. We all fall into this.

However, they did a study with 333 patients and they put them into a group that helped to support them and hold them accountable. You know what happened? 77% of the participants changed their eating and exercise habits!

That is the power of accountability. If you truly want change to happen, find a way to be held accountable!

Watch Your Mouth!

This past weekend, my family and I headed west to Chicago for the weekend. We spent Friday in Chicago and Saturday we braved the cold temperatures and attended the Ohio State versus Northwestern football game.

The Buckeyes played well and won 45-10. We had a blast.

Later that evening we were watching the local news who were discussing the game. Two different sportscasters stated that Ohio State showed poor sportsmanship by “running up the score.” They claimed that they did this because they ran a fake punt on 4th down and 2 with nine minutes to go and they were leading by 21 points.

I was amazed at what I was hearing. I then thought about all the people who were watching this who did not see the game and how their minds would be swayed into thinking this was the truth simply because it was said from a “trusted” source.

I know that OSU did not run up the score for the following reasons:
1) Coach Jim Tressel doesn’t have a “run up the score” bone in his body
2) The Buckeyes were up 21 points in and were playing in weather conditions that were anything but perfect. With 9 minutes to go and a couple of turnovers, Northwestern could have come back. Sure, this was not probable, but it was not impossible.
3) OSU’s offense has been anemic much of the season and Coach Tressel was probably trying to build confidence for the stretch run.

I bring all this up because we need to be careful what we say. Whoever came up with the slogan “Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me” was wrong. Words can be damaging.

So let’s watch what we say!

Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.

Psalm 141:3

Encouragement

Once ever two weeks or so, I have breakfast with a great friend and we help to hold each other accountable in certain areas of our lives. We eat at the same diner each time and are usually served by the same two waitresses.

This morning we were greeted by Wendy who was obviously not in a good mood. In fact, she was pretty mean which was not like her.

So when she brought our food to us, we told her that we were going to ask God to bless our food and that we wanted to pray for her. We then asked her how she would like to be prayed for. She told us and we did pray for her.

She came back about 10 minutes later and told us that she really appreciated the prayer and she said she was feeling much better. It was apparent to us that her mood had been lifted.

Her mood was more than likely improved because of the following two reasons:
1. God touched her heart and brought her peace as a result of our prayers
2. She was touched and encouraged that someone would actually pray for her.

This was a great lesson to me about how powerful it can be to ask if you can pray for someone, especially when they are down. Try it today, it might just be the encouragement someone needs!

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:11

Quotes

I am a huge fan of great quotes. I have been collecting them for years and have several file folders filled with them. I'm not sure why, but I do.

I recently received a link to a short movie which shares some quotes from some of the great leaders of the past and I thought it would be appropriate to share since we just elected our next leaders in this country. May each of these new leaders learn from those in the past and share their wisdom as others have!

To watch the movie, click here and then click on the purple box. Enjoy!

Calm as a Cat

This is a picture of one of our two cats, Frisco, aka "Fat Cat." Both of our cats do some crazy things that keep us laughing and they are a lot of fun. However, almost every morning they can be pretty annoying as they do a great job of waking us up so they can get fed. Thankfully, most times it is right around the time my alarm goes off which was the case this morning at 5 AM.

As I went downstairs to start my routine (feeding them, working out, quiet time with God) I was struck by how normal this morning was. The cats were acting exactly the same as they have just about every other morning. To them, they are going to have a great day with no anxiety...life is good...they are getting fed.

I thought about how different that is for many people who are waking up this morning with fear or anxiety because of the election results. I have to admit I had a little twinge of doubt in my mind as well.

However, I believe God wants us to be like my cats. Make it a great day...life is good...God is in control!

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7

Servant Leadership

This is a sad day for University of Toledo athletics, at least it is for me. Tom Amstutz, UT's football coach announced yesterday that he will be stepping down as UT's coach.

I am sad because Tom is a good man. His heart is as big as Texas and he truly cares for his players. However, his teams have struggled over the past several years, so in the business of football, a coach typically cannot survive that.

In the Toledo Blade this morning I found an interesting quote which sums up why I believe Coach Amstutz was such a good leader. Aaron Opelt, the Rockets Junior quarterback had this to say about his coach, "He looks after us. We're number one. He doesn't think about himself, ever. It's always about us."

As a leader, wouldn't you want that said of you?

Isn't that also what we can say about Jesus?..."He looks after us. We're number one. He doesn't think about himself, ever. It's always about us."

"Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave--just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."
Matthew 20:26b-28

Encouragement

In Saturday's Toledo Blade, an article appeared about Joel Osteen who was in Detroit last weekend. The popular preacher from Houston was in town speaking to a large group and promoting his wife Victoria's new book, Love Your Life.

Obviously this part of the country has been hit hard by the downturn in the economy. However, Osteen was being his optimistic self and preaching a message of prosperity which he says is very biblical.

Here are a few examples of “Osteenisms,” or words of encouragement, that Joel Osteen delivered at the Palace of Auburn Hills Oct. 24:

• “The Scripture says that God will prosper you in the desert. He said he’ll cause you to flourish even in a famine.”
• “You’ve got to believe that you can become everything God’s created you to be.”
• “I know maybe you’re thinking, ‘Well, Joel, I haven’t had a good year so far,’ but listen, you’ve got two more months left.”
• “You’ve got to get a vision on the inside. If you can see it on the inside, God can bring it to pass on the outside.”
• “It’s not enough to see it, you need to say it. What kind of words are coming out of your mouth?”
• “Every morning when I get out of bed, after I thank God for what he’s done, I just say it under my breath: ‘Something good is going to happen to me today.’ ”
• “Don’t let another day of your life go by that you’re not enjoying life. Someday may never come. You need to enjoy this day.”
• “Don’t make excuses. Make a decision.”
• “Even when it looks like there isn’t a way, God can make a way. God has a plan.”
• “God is getting you prepared and every day you’re faithful, every day you go to work and get there on time and give it your best, every day you do the right thing when the wrong thing is happening, that is a day that you’re passing the test. You’ve got to know that God has great things in your future. He is getting you prepared.”

Very good stuff! God does have great things in store for us!