I Dare Ya!

I dare you to take 3-4 minutes to test your knowledge of the Christmas story! You can do so at my new Blog location: http://www.5feet20.com/2010/12/17/retooning-the-nativity/. I hope to see you there!

Changes

I have been Blogging at this site for almost four years now and I am so thankful for all of you who read what I have to say. I really appreciate each of you very much.

I have recently gone through an overhaul of my website...actually it is a brand new website which is still a bit in process. As a result, I will no longer be blogging here, but at my new site. So...I am inviting you to visit me at www.5feet20.com - where I have my latest new post. If you would like to receive my posts in your email, you can sign up here. It takes about 11 seconds.

Thanks everyone--I look forward to seeing you at www.5feet20.com! Again, if you'd like to receive my posts via email, you can do so here.

The Gift of the Moment

Saturday morning, we woke very early and made the trek to Columbus for the annual clash between Ohio State and Michigan (won by the Buckeyes 37-7). All week I had been reading comments from some of Ohio State's senior football players talking about the game and how they could not believe that their careers as a Buckeye were coming to an end.

Dane Sazenbacher (pictured above in Saturday's game) was quoted often in our local paper because he is a Toledoan. He shared about how emotional the week would be for him and that his career just seemed to fly by.

On football Saturday mornings in Columbus, the band and thousands of fans gather at St. John Arena (OSU's old basketball arena) for the "skull session." The band runs through their pre-game and halftime shows in preparation for the afternoon's game which helps to get the fans fired up. Immediately before this (2 hours before kickoff), the team stops in on their way to the stadium to get prepared for the game. One of the senior players says a few short words and then Coach Jim Tressel addresses the crowd. The players then leave to the band playing "Fight the Team." It is a very cool thing!

This past Saturday at skull session, I kept watching Sanzenbacher as he walked in, something he had done close to 30 times now in his career. This time was different though. He could not stop looking around. It was obvious he was taking it all in, knowing this would be the last time he experienced this as a player. This emotional moment even got to me. I tried to explain what was happening to my family but I found it very difficult to speak as I was so choked up.

The thought occurred to me that Sanzenbacher might like to go back to relive some of these moments in his past four years, knowing now that he will not have another one. It's possible that he took these moments for granted and just now, as he approached the end, realized how special these moments were and are.

The same is true for me. I know that I take many moments for granted. I take my breathing for granted. I take my family for granted. I take the sun for granted. The list goes on and on.

The fact is, the breath I just took could be my last. It is possible that the next time I see each of my family members could be my last. I am not saying this to be morbid, but rather so we might realize that every moment is a gift to be cherished. I hope to be looking around in awe at my everyday moments the way Dane Sanzenbacher was on Saturday. I hope to not take anything for granted! I hope that I realize how much of a gift this present moment is. How about you?

Why, you don not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

James 4:14

Thanksgiving

As evening approached, the disciples came to him and said, “This is a remote place, and it’s already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.”

Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”

“We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered.

“Bring them here to me,” he said. And he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. The number of those who ate was about five thousand men, besides women and children. (Matthew 14:15-21, emphasis added)

You may have heard this story many times. The miraculous multiplication of food. Incredible. Yet, the part that strikes me in this story is what Jesus does immediately before He performs this miracle. He gives thanks for what He had.

When I try to picture myself in that story to see how I might have reacted, I think I would have panicked. When I knew that thousands needed to be fed and all I had were five loaves of bread and two fish, I probably would be saying something like, So what are we supposed to do with that?!

I certainly don’t think I would be thankful in the moment, precisely because I would only be in the moment. If I had a larger lens, if I saw the bigger picture, then I would be in better position to be thankful. Jesus saw the big picture and thus was thankful for the little things. Had He not given thanks, perhaps this miracle may not have happened.

The fact is that each of us has much to be thankful for. Yes, things might be tough. It may seem like we may only have five loaves and two fish, but as Jesus showed us, when we look at the bigger picture we can see how blessed we truly are!

So let's give thanks! Happy Thanksgiving!

Thankful for the Thorns

Give thanks in all circumstances.

1 Thessalonians 5:18a

As we approach Thanksgiving, the thought of giving thanks might be difficult for many due to tough circumstances in their lives. With that in mind, I hope that this story is a blessing:

Sandra felt as low as the heels of her shoes when she pulled open the florist shop door, against a November gust of wind. Her life had been as sweet as a spring breeze and then, in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a "minor" automobile accident stole her joy. This was Thanksgiving week and the time she should have delivered their infant son. She grieved over their loss.

Troubles had multiplied.

Her husband's company "threatened" to transfer his job to a new location. Her sister had called to say that she could not come for her long awaited holiday visit. What's worse, Sandra's friend suggested that Sandra's grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer. "She has no idea what I'm feeling," thought Sandra with a shudder. "Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?" she wondered. "For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life, but took her child's?"

"Good afternoon, can I help you?"

Sandra was startled by the approach of the shop clerk. "I . . I need an arrangement," stammered Sandra. "For Thanksgiving? I'm convinced that flowers tell stories," she continued.

"Are you looking for something that conveys gratitude this Thanksgiving?"

"Not exactly!" Sandra blurted out. "In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong."

Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the clerk said, "I have the perfect arrangement for you." Then the bell on the door rang, and the clerk greeted the new customer, "Hi, Barbara, let me get your order." She excused herself and walked back to a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and what appeared to be long-stemmed thorny roses. Except, the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped: there were no flowers.

"Do you want these in a box?" asked the clerk. Sandra watched - was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers! She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed.

"Yes, please," Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. "You'd think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again," she said, as she gently tapped her chest.

Sandra stammered, "Ah, that lady just left with . . . Uh . . . She left with no flowers!"

"That's right," said the clerk. "I cut off the flowers. That's the 'Special.’ I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet. Barbara came into the shop three years ago, feeling much as you do today," explained the clerk. "She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had just lost her father to cancer; the family business was failing; her son had gotten into drugs; and she was facing major surgery. That same year I had lost my husband," continued the clerk. "For the first time in my life, I had to spend the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too much debt to allow any travel."

"So what did you do?" asked Sandra.

"I learned to be thankful for thorns," answered the clerk quietly. "I've always thanked God for the good things in my life and I never questioned Him why those good things happened to me, but when the bad stuff hit, I cried out, ‘Why? Why me?!' It took time for me to learn that the dark times are important to our faith! I have always enjoyed the 'flowers' of my life, but it took the thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort! You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others."

Sandra sucked in her breath, as she thought about what her friend had tried to tell her. "I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God ." Just then someone else walked in the shop. "Hey, Phil!" the clerk greeted the balding, rotund man. "My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement . . . twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems!" laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.

"Those are for your wife?" asked Sandra incredulously. "Do you mind telling me why she wants a bouquet that looks like that?" "Four years ago, my wife and I nearly divorced," Phil replied. "After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord's grace and guidance, we trudged through problem after problem, the Lord rescued our marriage. Jenny here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she had learned from "thorny" times. That was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific "problem" and give thanks for what that problem taught us." As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special!"

"I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life" Sandra said to the clerk. "It's all too . . . fresh."

"Well," the clerk replied carefully, "my experience has shown me that the thorns make the roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember that it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don't resent the thorns."

Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on her resentment. "I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please," she managed to choke out.

"I hoped you would," said the clerk gently. "I'll have them ready in a minute."

"Thank you. What do I owe you?"

"Nothing. Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first year's arrangement is always on me." The clerk smiled and handed a card to Sandra. "I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would like to read it first."

It read: "My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked you a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain. Show me that, through my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant." Praise Him for the roses; thank Him for the thorns. God Bless all of you. Be thankful for all that the Lord does for you."Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, and leave the rest to God."

We often try to fix problems with WD-40 and Duct tape. God did it with nails.

10 Ways to Know It's Time to Quit

This post appeared recently at Stirred Up Leadership and I thought I would share it here:

The journey into a profound spirituality for Geri Scazzero began when she said, “I quit.”

Refusing to continue pretending everything was “fine,” she told her husband she was quitting their church – and he was the pastor!

The powerful journey they took together – to “quit” the things that really don’t belong to God’s kingdom and embrace the things that do – changed their personal lives, their marriage and their church. Take the following assessment below and see if you need to quit:

1. You need the approval of others to feel good about yourself.

2. You are angry, sad, or disappointed and feel guilty about it.

3. You believe you don't have choices.

4. You do for others what they can and should do for themselves.

5. Your rarely consider your own hopes and dreams because of your focus on others.

6. You say “yes’ when you would rather say “no”.

7. You have difficulty speaking up when you disagree or prefer something different.

8. You’re becoming a less instead of a more loving person.

9. You are resentful and tired because you regularly “try to do it all.”

10. You are afraid to admit your weaknesses and flaws.

If two or three apply to you, you may need to start quitting. If four to six apply, you have a lot to quit; if you scored seven or above, your true self may be “buried alive.”

When we quit those things that are damaging to our souls, we are freed up to choose ways of being that are rooted in love and lead to life – both for us and others. Quitting goes hand in hand with choosing. Something breaks inside of us when we finally say, “No more!” The following are 8 "Quits" essential to all genuine spirituality.

Quit Being Afraid of What Others Think. (Choose Freedom)
I am willing to cut through the disapproval of others and do what is good, true and loving. I no longer ignore the values I hold dearly. Who I am “on stage” before others is the same person I am “off stage” when I am by myself.

Quit Lying. (Choose Truth)
The degree to which I live in the truth –with myself, God and others- is the degree to which I am free. Learning how to speak the truth respectfully, honestly and clearly is one of the most significant ways I can respect the image of God in myself and others.

Quit Dying to the Wrong Things. (Choose Delighting in God’s Gifts)
I will no longer set aside or devalue activities or relationships that cause my soul to feel fully alive (e.g. music, dance, art, the outdoors, travel). I will take the time to explore my internal world of thoughts, feelings, values, loves, beliefs and motivations.

Quit Denying Anger, Sadness, and Fear. (Choose Embracing Your Humanity)
When it comes to feeling, I will avoid extremes –neither neglecting my emotions nor allowing them to run my life. I will allow myself to experience them in the presence of God, calmly think them through, and then take appropriate action.

Quit Blaming. (Choose to Take Responsibility)
As a human being made in God’s image, I recognize that no one is responsible for my life but me. I reclaim my freedom to choose my own life and help others do the same. I can’t change others, but I can change myself – with God’s grace.

Quit Overfunctioning. (Choose Letting Go)
I will no longer do for others what they can and should do for themselves. I will push through my fears in the face of resistance, asking God for courage and wisdom.

Quit Faulty Thinking. (Choose to Live in Reality)
I will refuse to make things bigger than they are. I will not take offense or blame for something before having all the data. And I will not believe the falsehood that things will never change. I will position myself so that the Spirit can correct my wrong assumptions and align me with the truth.

Quit Living Someone Else’s Life. (Choose to be Yourself)
By God’s grace I will embrace the unique life He has given me. I will listen to my God-given rhythms, set appropriate boundaries with others, and let go of other people’s agenda for me. In this way I will enter into the joy of my own beautifully, God-given life and carry out His unique purposes for me.

Listening to God

I was in a meeting last week with someone, named Jessica, who was telling us how she shared a story to a group of young girls. This is how it went:

Imagine a little girl named Mary who has a friend over. All her friend does is talk about herself and her stuff. After a few hours of playing it's time for Mary's friend to go home. Not once does Mary's friend ask what Mary's feeling, or really anything about Mary.

How do you think Mary felt?

The girls who were listening to this story were totally engaged and they all said things like, "lonely" or "sad" or "not important."

Jessica then said, "Well, that's exactly how God must feel when we do the same thing to Him. We so often go to Him to tell Him all about us and our stuff and we rarely listen to Him."

Pretty good picture, huh? I think we all sometimes need to be taught like children - at least I do.

Help!

I suppose I am like most guys in that I don't like to ask for help (I know quite a few women in this boat too!). I guess I view it as a sign of weakness. However, it is actually a sign of pride.

This past week was more stressful than most. As I was reflecting on the week, I realized how much I had to rely on others for their help.

• We had a situation with my son which required prayer and many stepped up in a big way
• My wife's sister-in-law passed away last week and her funeral was Friday, the same day as one of our Truth at Work group meetings that I facilitate. As a result, a good friend stepped in to lead that for me in my absence.
• Saturday, we had our Gala Gathering and auction in Toledo which is a great event in our community. Truth at Work was one of the benefiting ministries and many organizations and individuals were very generous in donating some incredible items for the auction.

This weekend I was overcome with thankfulness for those who stepped in to help me. Several of these people shared with me how their helping me actually blessed them. I realized that had I had my usual attitude of "I don't need help," I would have actually been robbing others of a blessing...and I would have been adding much more stress to my plate!

I am discovering that strong leaders know they need help and are not reluctant to ask for it. We all have strengths and abilities. When we allow the body of Christ to come together and do its work, it is amazing what can happen.

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us.

Romans 12:3-5a

Words in Anger

As some of you may be aware, I lead four monthly round-table groups of Christian business and ministry leaders in the Toledo area. The purpose of these gatherings is to help each of our members (usually 12-15 in a group) to grow their organizations in a God-honoring way, while at the same time helping them to grow personally and spiritually. The name of this ministry is Truth at Work.

Each of these sessions is four hours long and, though I am the facilitator, I receive so much from these times together--I truly feel like the most blessed person on this planet that I get to do this. This morning's meeting was no exception.

One of our members in today's meeting shared a line which I thought was great. She said, "Whenever I get angry, I try to just leave the room because I have never said anything when I was angry in which I later said to myself, 'Wow, that was brilliant. I am so glad I just said that!'"

You know what? I can say the same exact thing in my life. It seems that when I am angry is when I say the things I regret the most. Perhaps I need to follow this person's advice when I'm angry and just leave before I say anything I might regret. I guess my mom was right all along when she used to tell me, "If you can't say anything nice about someone, don't say anything at all."

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.

Proverbs 29:11

Lemons or Lemonade?

I just found out last week that a good friend of mine had just lost his job. I called Rick immediately to see how he was doing and he said something like this, "I'm absolutely fine! I have a sense that God has something else in store for me." He almost sounded a bit excited.

What an amazing reaction. I heard it said once in on online interview I was listening to that when we lose a job, our reaction ought to be, "Wow, I can't wait to see how God's going to provide for me now!" That is obviously much easier said than done. However, Rick's response was basically the same as this...expectant on God to do something really cool. He is expecting God to turn lemons into lemonade.

I don't have a clue what God has in store for Rick but I do know that even through this difficult time, Rick is pointing people toward Christ through his example. Something we can all learn from for when we are faced with difficult challenges.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

Confession

I have to tell you that I am not a Notre Dame fan. Never have been and probably never will be. However, I was very impressed with how they handled a very difficult situation this past weekend.

You have probably heard about the tragedy that struck the South Bend campus almost two weeks ago. Declan Sullivan (pictured above), a student videographer, was killed Oct. 27 when a hydraulic lift he was on toppled over while he was filming football practice in high winds - click here for the full story.

As soon as I heard this, my heart was hurting. In addition to my feelings for his family, I thought how awful it would have to be to be the coach (head coach Brian Kelly) who made the decision to practice outdoors that day. I was wondering how the university would handle this. This past weekend I found out--they did it with class.

"Declan Sullivan was entrusted to our care, and we failed to keep him safe," the Rev. John Jenkins, Notre Dame's president wrote in an email to students. "We at Notre Dame and ultimately I as president are responsible. Words cannot express our sorrow to the Sullivan family and to all involved."

This is a terrible situation that is extremely sad. However, I am very proud of Notre Dame's president for stepping up to accept the blame. He, personally, had nothing to do with the accident, but he is accepting responsibility on behalf of the university, a very classy thing to do. It seems that this is not normal in our society, especially the way lawsuits are filed at the drop of a hat. But Rev. Jenkins got this right.

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.

James 5:16a

Man's Best Friend?

I heard about a test for husbands to see if their wives love them as much as their dogs. Here's how it's done:

Lock your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car for an hour. When you open it up see who's happier to see you.

Come on, I don't care who you are, that's funny. At least I thought it was until today.

We are watching our grand-puppy, Tysen, (pictured above) since our daughter Kristin (his "mom") is working a long shift at the hospital today. I just picked my son Robbie up from school and he entered the house first. Tysen lovingly greeted him and then came to see who else was coming in the door. When he saw it was me, he immediately went back to showering Robbie with attention.

So if I performed the test above, I might be the only guy to not have either his wife or dog be happy to see him! Maybe if I start carrying pork chops in my pockets...

Genuine Article

I have been told that bank tellers used to be trained to detect counterfeit bills by putting the tellers in a room and showing them genuine currency. They were taught the nuances of each type of bill and they were encouraged to touch, smell and study every square millimeter of each bill.

After they were trained they were tested. The tellers were put in front of a conveyor belt loaded with genuine bills. Occasionally someone would insert a counterfeit bill onto the belt. The tellers would immediately look at it, pull it off, and say, “I can't tell you why, but something's not right about this bill. This must be a counterfeit."

The reason they were able to detect the fakes was that they had spent so much time with the real deal. They knew what the genuine article was all about so anything that didn't match up to it exactly stuck out like a sore thumb.

The same principle holds true in our lives. We are bombarded with so much information today that it is sometimes difficult to discern what is true and what is not. The Word of God is truth. Just like these tellers, we need to spend time in it so that we know what is genuine and what is fake.

If you want to see a cool way that I recently learned to do this, here is a link to a message I gave in our church a couple months ago.

I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.

Psalm 119:11

Playing To Audience of One

On Friday night, Connie and I went to the Make a Difference Tour featuring Toby Mac, Third Day and Michael W. Smith. This is something that was the brainchild of Max Lucado that was designed to help World Vision to find sponsors for children in other countries.

The concert was really good but one thing stood out to me at the very beginning. A late addition to the lineup was a guy named Jason Gray (He has a new song out which is very popular called More Like Falling in Love - listen here).

Anyway, the show was scheduled to begin at 7:00 PM. Ten minutes before 7:00, Gray came out to begin. Needless to say, many of the seats were still empty and many people were milling around trying to find their seats. I thought that these would be very difficult conditions to play under as it had to be pretty distracting.

However, I was very impressed with Gray. It appeared that the people walking around were not an issue to him. He gave it his all, regardless of his surroundings.

I have heard it said that we all should remember that we are really playing for an audience of One. That is exactly how Jason Gray played on Friday night.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Colossians 3:23-24

Talking Others Up

I heard a great prayer the other day, "Lord, help me to be the man my dog thinks I am!"

This reminded me of my late mentor, John Savage. When I graduated from college, he took an interest in me and met regularly with me to help me navigate life. From time to time, I would see him in a restaurant with some of his peers. He would always introduce me to his friends and say glowing things about me. I had to resist the urge to look over my shoulder to see if he was talking about someone behind me because I didn't believe what he was saying was true.

The bottom line is that John believed in me...even more than I did. This had a great impact on me. I desired, I mean I really wanted to live up to what John said about me. I wanted to be the person he thought I was. I'm not sure if it was because I didn't want to disappoint him or if there was another reason. But no matter, the point is that his positive comments about me helped to make me want to grow, to become better.

Because of the way John Savage "talked me up" to others and the impact this had on my life, I try to do this to others as well. So who can you "talk up" today?

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:11

Others First

My 14 year-old son, Robert, and I have been reading a chapter each week in John Maxwell's book, Winning with People. It has been a great time together learning some really good stuff. Here is an excerpt from the chapter we read this past Sunday:

I recently read an article about actress Angelina Jolie. The catalyst for her change in perspective was a script. Jolie, who won an Oscar in 1999 for her role in Girl, Interrupted, could have been the poster girl for a life adrift. The child of actors Jon Voight and Marcheline Bertrand, she had grown up in Hollywood and indulged many of its excesses. She was called a "wild child." And she was well known for drug usage, outrageous behavior, and sometimes self-destructive actions. She was convinced she would die young.

"There was a time where I never had a sense of purpose, never felt useful as a person," says Jolie. "I think a lot of people have that feeling--wanting to kill yourself or take drugs to numb yourself out because you can't shut it off or you just feel bad and you don't know what it's from."

Success in movies did little to help her. "I felt so off balance all the time," admits Jolie. "I remember one of the most upsetting times in my life was after I had attained success, financial stability and I was in love, and I thought, 'I have everything that they say you should have to be happy and I'm not happy.'"

But then she read the script for Beyond Borders, the story of a woman living a life of privilege who discovers the plight of refugees and orphans around the world. Jolie recalls, "Something in me really wanted to understand what the film was about, these people in the world , all these displaced people and war and famine and refugees." For a year she traveled around the world with UN workers. "I got my greatest life education and changed drastically," she observes. She visited camps in Sierra Leone, Tanzania, Cote d'Ivoire, Cambodia, Pakistan, Namibia, and Thailand. Her entire perspective changed. She realized that the entire world was made up of other people, many of whom were in dire circumstances, many of whom she could help.

When the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees asked her to become goodwill ambassador in 2001, she was happy to do it. She also began donating money to help refugees and orphans, including $3 million to the UN's refugee program. (She says she makes a "stupid amount of money" to act in movies.) And she adopted a Cambodian orphan, Maddox. Recently Worth magazine listed her as one of the twenty-five most influential philanthropists in the world. She estimates she gives almost a third of her income to charity.

Jolie puts it all into perspective: "You could die tomorrow and you've done a few movies, won some awards--that doesn't mean anything. But if you've built schools or raised a child or done something to make things better for other people, then it just feels better. Life is better." Why does she feel that way? Because she finally gets the big picture. She stopped focusing on herself and began putting other people ahead of herself.

The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."

Galatians 5:14

Listen First

A man enters a cocktail lounge and goes directly to the bartender. "Do you have anything that will cure the hiccups?" he asks. Without a word the bartender slaps him across the face with a wet rag.

"Hey! What's the big idea?" the surprised man shouts.

The bartender smiles and says, "Well, you don't have the hiccups anymore, do you?"

The man replies, "I never did. I wanted something to help my wife who's in the car."

Who do you relate to in this story? Hopefully not the bartender. Unfortunately, I am like the bartender way too often. When someone is talking to me, I have a tendency to jump to conclusions before they are done. I'm especially guilty of this when listening to my wife.

I am trying to discipline myself to not only listen, but to ask clarifying questions before coming to a conclusion or giving an answer. I am working on being more patient and holding my tongue until I have all the facts. How about you?

Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.

Proverbs 17:28

Shhhh...

Today is my favorite day of October. Not because it's the 22nd, but because it is the day I scheduled my monthly retreat.

Earlier this year I began the process of getting away for most of a day to worship, pray, listen and whatever else I feel led to do (read, write, plan, etc...). I have been going to a cabin in the woods in a beautiful setting.

It just so happens that today's retreat comes at an interesting time. I am extremely busy right now and a big part of me would rather stay in my office and plow through some of the things I'd like to get done. However, experience has shown me that these times of quiet listening have been some of the most productive times I have (which goes totally against my nature).

So, I am going to trust God that He is going to show up in a mighty way today. I can't wait!

"Be still and know that I am God."

Psalm 46:10a

You Can't Have A Testimony Without The Test

As mentioned in my last post, I participated as a table leader for the Walk to Emmaus this past weekend. At my table were five other individuals, many of which had experienced some severe life tests.

During one of the discussions, I asked the table, "Why do you think God wants to use us to reach others on earth, when we are all so messed up?" One of the guys at the table, who had perhaps lived the most difficult life, responded by saying, "Because we are messed up." He went on to say that because of his tests, he will now be able to help people who are going through similar things. He was absolutely right.

I have heard it said that God never wastes a hurt. He will use it for good. The fact is, it's impossible to have a testimony without the test.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

James 1:2-4

All Things Are Possible

Sunday night I returned home from a Walk to Emmaus (based on the story in Luke 24:13-35) where I was serving on the team. This is a 72 hour (3 day) spiritual renewal weekend which is truly something that words cannot describe. This was my third "walk" including the time I was a participant over five years ago. This time I had the privilege of being a table leader whose role is to facilitate the discussions about the different talks we heard.

Though I got very little sleep and was away from my family, this time away was so worth it. I got to experience God's hand at work. It was as if I got to watch the Holy Spirit at work! (If you have never been on one of these, I HIGHLY recommend it--it is life changing!)

There were over 50 guys together for this weekend sitting at eight tables. On Friday morning we were assigned to our tables. At the Table of Matthew were myself and five other guys, all from totally different backgrounds. Some were young. Some old. Some were quiet. Some loud. Some have been law-abiding citizens. Others had been to prison multiple times or seriously involved in drugs. That morning I looked around at this group and I thought that there was no way that this group would like each other, let alone come together.

Over Saturday afternoon, there was a time when I thought that things were not going well. It seemed that some of the guys were getting on other's nerves. Then throughout the rest of the weekend's events, God did something amazing.

On Sunday morning our table had a time of prayer in which each member thanked God for what He had done in their hearts. Many shared that they were so thankful that God had softened their hearts toward one another and brought us together as a unit. They were so thankful that God had placed them at the Table of Matthew.

Just another reminder that "with God all things are possible." (Matthew 19:26b)

Wise Counsel

At the beginning of the year I began on a new book project that I am very excited about. I am still searching for a title but the overall premise of the book is how to find peace in the midst of chaos. The title I have right now is The Quest for Peace, How to Remain Calm in This Chaotic World (By the way, I am open to title suggestions--please add them in the comments section!).

This summer I finished with the first draft and gave it to several people to get their editorial feedback. I had asked for comments on any theological issues they have, any places where it seemed slow or boring and any places where there wrer grammatical errors or typos. I asked that they get back to me by this past weekend. So, Monday I spent a good portion of my day pouring over the comments and suggestions.

What I found amazing was that very few people had the same corrections when it came to spelling or grammar issues. It seemed that most errors were only found by one person while they were skipped over by the others. When combined, I had quite a few corrections to make and I was so thankful that all five of the readers had provided their input. Even though the book has several more stages to go through, had I only asked a couple of people or, worse yet, had I not asked for any help, this book would have probably contained many errors.

The same holds true in our lives. When faced with a tough decision, it is wise to get other trusted advisers involved.

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.
Proverbs 15:22

We All Have Faith

Have you ever heard someone described as a "man of faith" or as a "woman of faith"? Sure, we all have.

For some reason I was thinking about this while driving on a trip with my son a week or so ago. We happened to be traveling at dusk over a two-lane road in Indiana which was anything but straight. I have to admit that it was a little frightening with the oncoming traffic coming at us and being somewhat difficult to see.

I realized that the only way I could continue on was if I had faith that the driver coming at us would remain on his or her side of the yellow line. The same is true for all of us. We all have to exercise faith everyday just to function...even if it is only faith in someone else to do what they are supposed to do.

In other words, we are all men and women of faith.

The real question is, what are we placing our faith in? If we place our faith in man, we will eventually (and always) be disappointed. However, we can be assured of one thing. If God promised it, you can always count on it, even if it seems impossible.

Forsaking
All
I
Trust
Him

It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.

Psalm 118:8

Welcome to Churchville

I Was recently emailed this parable that was originally published by SalvationLife. While this is written to be a lesson to the local church, the same exact principle holds true in our workplaces and everywhere we find ourselves.

Welcome to Churchville, Population 10. (Generally very good and likeable people.)
An exciting opportunity has come to Churchville, as electricity has become available to the residents.
Time passes, and a very interesting thing happens. Half of the residents of Churchville take advantage of the availability of electricity by bringing it into their homes. One of these comes to believe so strongly in the benefits of electricity that he (upper left) is willing to give anything for the sake of electricity and deeply desires for all of his neighbors to come to experience it as he has. The four others who have connected to electricity are also enthusiastic about it. It has dramatically changed how they live their everyday lives. This "connected" half of Churchville's population all exhibit a love of electricity and a high degree of hospitality toward and concern for their neighbors.

But half of the residents of Churchville never chose to connect their homes to the available electric current, and they have varying reasons. One of them simply isn't convinced that electricity exists. He says that his neighbors who claim to have electricity in their homes are just fooling themselves with wishful thinking. Yet, even though he thinks these five neighbors of his are living under a delusion, he remains in Churchville rather than leaving, because it's a good place to be.

The other four of our non-electric residents are a bit more of a puzzle. They believe in electricity, but for whatever reason still have yet to make the appropriate arrangements for it to come into their home. The most notable thing, though, was three of these four seem to be unaware that they are living without electricity! They talk and often act as if they have it in their homes, even to the point of occasionally buying an appliance or sending the electric company money for the bill they think they owe. (One of them even volunteers to serve on the board of the electric company.) Yet these three continue to go on with their electricity-less lives, with no realization that they could be living any differently.

Only one of the non-electric residents notices the gap between how she is living and what her life would be like with electricity. One of the "connected" neighbors gave her a light bulb, and she really wants more light in her house. Neighbors and electric company workers are confident that she will make the necessary arrangements and become connected soon.

So what's the point of the parable? I am a big fan of the REVEAL Spiritual Life Survey for churches. It seeks to give church leaders a measurable way of looking at how effectively they help people grow. Our church participated almost two years ago, and will take our second survey this fall to see how we have improved.

Our results indicate that somewhere close to 1/2 of our people have yet to significantly arrange their lives in ways that would make growth in their love for God and others natural. Also, of these, only about 1 in 5 recognize that things should be different.

Of all of the things that are presented to church leaders as worthy of our time and energy, nothing is more essential than this: modeling and communicating how profoundly good it is to live our lives fully in the kingdom of God, so that any others who desire to do so will know how, and that others will have a more accurate understanding of what it is they're being invited to in the Christian life.

"Jesus went into Galilee, proclaiming the good news: 'It's time. The kingdom of God is now available. Change your mind and direction and believe the good news." (Mark 1:15, paraphrase)

A Good Name

My son Robbie and I just returned from a weekend trip to Champaign, Illinois where we watched the Buckeyes from Ohio State barely beat the Fighting Illini from Illinois. It was a very fun weekend!

On the way home this morning, we were looking for a place to stop for breakfast. We passed by a couple of local diners that looked to me like they would be worth trying but Robbie said, "No, I'd really rather wait to try to find a Bob Evans." It took us quite a while but we finally found one and enjoyed a great, and really big, breakfast (and one that probably didn't help our arteries much).

Robbie knew what he was getting with Bob Evans regardless of the city we were in. He knew they had a good name so he was willing to wait.

That is a very good thing for a company. It is, perhaps, an even greater thing for an individual. In fact, the Bible says it is better than having great riches. So how is your name?

A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver and gold.

Proverbs 22:1

Soul Care Pillars

So often I feel as if my soul is suffering in the midst of the demands and stress that the world, and I put on it. This morning I read something on Stirred Up Leadership that I thought was excellent. So thank you to Mindy Caliguire for a very well done post. I hope it resonates with you like it did with me!

Architecturally speaking, pillars are strong and reliable. They stand the test of time. Properly placed, they create space and buttress a structure.

Over time we have recognized the important, space-making role that core spiritual practices play in helping us both live and lead from the strong structure of a healthy soul, with plenty of space for God. These specific practices are foundational to what Soul Care offers.

Experience some right now:

Prayer
Take a minute now to turn your thoughts towards God directly. Is there something you’re grateful for? Take moment to thank the Source of all good things. Something you’re worried about? Specifically name it… and ask for God’s help. Totally confused about something? Go ahead and ask for wisdom! Perhaps you want to simply sit in silence, attentive to God’s presence and love. Just for a minute—or twenty!— breathe deeply, and rest in God’s presence and love. James 1, Philippians 4, James 1, Psalm 131

Spiritual Friendship
What’s the most challenging area in your life these days? Is anyone walking through that with you? Be sure to let your soul-level friends know what’s really going on. Pick up the phone, send the text, write that email, or just stop by… they may pray with you, encourage you, hear your confession, or even just “be with you” in it in a way that helps you stay open to God. Any of your friends going through something significant these days? Take a moment to pray for them, too… and then connect. Ephesians 4:16, Galatians 6

Use of Scripture
Unlike any other book, the Bible is “living and active” and a variety of ways exist to study, read, meditate on, and be shaped by the truths. We do not want merely to know the principles it contains: we want to connect with the Person it proclaims. We can rely on it, take comfort in it, be corrected by it, find hope and direction though it. Hebrews 4:12, Psalm 119, John 5:39

Solitude/Silence
The demands of daily life—especially in our 24/7 “wired” world—make it difficult to really hear from God and allow His person to form the basis of our identity. Even Jesus needed time specifically set aside to connect with His Father. Might there be things God’s been trying to convey, but you’re not listening? Not noticing? Take a few minutes to turn off all electronics (yes, even the computer!), and pay attention to God. Better yet, look at your schedule now and set aside a few hours—or days—in the next month to “be alone with God”. At-home parents, executives, pastors, students… we all need solitude. Psalm 46, Mark 1:35-37

Soul Searching
Where has God been at work in your life lately? In the pages of a journal, or in a few minutes of prayer, ask God to help you search through yesterday… where have you sensed His presence, or not? In hindsight, do you notice things you missed in the moment? Are there areas God has shown you where you strayed in an attitude or choice? If you’re human, the answer is likely yes! Confession yields life-giving freedom and soul-level peace. So, out with it. Come clean. Find grace. Psalm 139:23-24, 1 John 1

Simplicity
True simplicity is about developing a singularity of heart, or of purpose. It may impact our “stuff,” but most importantly it describes our focus—everything in life aligns to a central goal: Total surrender and abandonment to God. While many of us long to live into that kind of destiny, we often unknowingly clog and clutter our own path. Do you know who God’s made you to be, and for what purpose? How closely does your current life reflect that goal? Take whatever step you can today to bring alignment between those two things. By doing that, you’re caring for your soul through simplicity. Let God know it’s a journey you are willing to take… maybe write about it in a journal… and then pursue it wholeheartedly. Hebrews 12:1-2, Matthew 6:19-34, Prov. 11:3

Something to Die For

Occasionally I will read something that really strikes me as something worth sharing. Today I read this from Rick Warren regarding our convictions. As you read this, I encourage you to ask yourself what you would be willing to die for?

Every day in the business and professional world we see - and sometimes suffer - the consequences of people acting and making decisions without clear, well-thought-out convictions. As someone has said, if you stand for nothing, you will fall for anything.


Dictionaries usually define conviction as a fixed or strong belief. In reality, however, conviction is much more than that. Your convictions also include your values, commitments, and motivations. I like the definition of conviction I once heard from Bible teacher Howard Hendricks: "A belief is something you will argue about. A conviction is something you will die for!"

Convictions determine our conduct. They motivate us to act in certain ways.When people initially become followers of Jesus, for example, they often do things simply because other Christians suggest or model those behaviors. They pray, read the Bible and attend worship services because they observe and want to emulate the examples of others.

This is reasonable for new believers. Little children learn the same way. However, as we grow and mature, we eventually must develop our own reasons for doing what we do. Those reasons become convictions. Here are some important principles about convictions to remember:

Biblical convictions are essential for spiritual growth and maturity. An irony about our world today is people often have strong convictions about weak issues (things like their favorite sports, clothing and music) while having weak convictions about major issues (the difference between right and wrong).

Try making a list of your spiritual convictions. Are your convictions weak on any major issues? The Bible teaches us, "Keep your eyes open, hold tight to your convictions, give it all you've got, be resolute, and love without stopping" (1 Corinthians 16:12-15).

People without convictions are at the mercy of circumstances. If you fail to determine what is important and how you will live, other people will determine it for you.

People without convictions are weak individuals that mindlessly follow the crowd. I believe the apostle Paul was talking about conviction when he said in Romans 12:2, "Don't let the world squeeze you into its own mold, but let God remold your mind from within ..." (Phillips translation).

Conviction helps us be diligent in continuing to grow spiritually. Growth requires time and effort. Without convictions about growth, people become discouraged and give up. No one persists with a difficult task unless convinced there is a good reason for doing it. This applies to prayer, studying the Bible, and seeking to live out biblical principles in our everyday life and work.

Knowing what to do (knowledge), why to do it (perspective) and how to do it (skill) are worthless without the conviction to motivate you to actually do it! People who have made the greatest impact on this world, for good or for evil, were those with the strongest, deepest convictions. They were not necessarily the smartest, wealthiest, or best educated, but convictions moved them to move the world.

Buckeyes and People

I'm a big fan of buckeyes…not just the football Buckeyes, but actual buckeyes. This fall, my wife Connie and I have encountered many buckeye trees and we have been able to collect a few of these awesome treasures.

I had a couple of these unopened shells sitting on my desk for a while, waiting for them to open up to reveal the beautiful nut that had been growing inside. After viewing these for a few days I began to think about how similar a buckeye is to a human being.

These outer shells of a buckeye are not very attractive and they even have barbs on them which resemble a porcupine. So not only are they ugly but they can actually hurt you. However, once they open, a surprisingly attractive nut is revealed. Buckeyes actually look like they are made of a rich type of wood that is polished perfectly—very beautiful.

Many people might not look very pretty from the outside and might even hurt others at times. However, each and every person (even the unlovable one) is created by God and loved by God. This makes even the most disliked person someone worth loving. Because, just like a buckeye, under that “ugly” shell there is a beautiful creation inside. Hopefully this will remind us to be more forgiving and understanding and help us to remember to extend a bit more grace to others, even those who drive us crazy…and maybe even our spouses!

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

That's All I Can Stands!

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."
~Harold Whitman

Is that not one of the all-time greatest quotes? I love it.

Isn't it amazing how each of us is wired? Think of it, no one person is wired the same exact way you are. Each of us have different likes and dislikes. Something that makes one person bored completely lights up another. That's incredible to me.

I once heard Bill Hybels give a talk about a topic called Holy Discontent, which he also wrote about in a book by the same name. He said that he spent some time pondering what preceded vision. What happened inside of Billy Graham that made him want to rent his first stadium? What happened inside of Martin Luther King which birthed his dream?

He came to the conclusion that vision is preceded by something that wrecks us, something we can't stand. Something so strong that it spurs us into action.

Popeye had moments like these. They were typically when his beloved Olive Oil was being harassed that he said, "That's all I can stands, I can't stands no more!" At this point he would gulp down his spinach and then open up a can of you know what.

So what can't you stands? Answering that question will help you to discern what God made you for. It will also help you to understand what makes you come alive. And this is what the world needs, just ask Harold Whitman.